Nothing to Lose, Everything to Give

Last month I was a presenter at ALG Vacation's Kindness Conference and heard Hoda Kotb, the Keynote Presenter, share a line on stage that gave me pause and inspiration at the same time. 

She was reflecting on her battle with illness and said:

“You can’t hurt me anymore.”

• She wasn’t being defiant; she was being free.
• She put HER LIFE into perspective. 
• She realized the things that matter and those that didn't.

Once you realize you can’t lose what you never truly had, fear disappears.

It reminded me of something I often tell sales teams: if you have a lead but not an agreement, you don’t really have the business yet.

If it doesn’t close, you didn’t “lose” it, don't worry, you never had it in the first place.

This perspective takes the sting away and frees you to focus on what you can do next, and also learn what you can control: 

Show up with value, confidence, and kindness.

Yes, we all get disappointed if an opportunity doesn't commit to working with us. 

However, I've learned over the years that often "NO" can mean "No for Now" and not necessarily "No for Later."

For many years, I coached high school volleyball with a retired Army Special Ops Sergeant who became a Head Volleyball Coach with an impressive winning record.

He often wore a shirt to practice that said:

“But did you die?”

It sounds harsh.

But among military friends, it’s a way of defusing complaints about tough experiences.

It’s a simple reminder: you survived.

Perspective.

If you made it through, then maybe the bad moment wasn’t as bad as it felt.  

Our volleyball team utilized this philosophy when we faced tough opponents and continued to survive and thrive. 

Ray Snisky, President of ALG Vacations and Amstar DMC is this week's podcast guest, and his leadership inspiration fits in perfectly.

Ray grew up in the Bronx and climbed to the top of global leadership. 

Most people, once they achieve success, start holding tighter, protecting what they think they might lose.

But Ray flips it.

• He leads with generosity 
• He leads with humility
• He leads with zero ego

Instead of clinging to control, Ray Snisky gives others confidence, autonomy, and recognition. 

He shared during the interview that he has never worried about losing a job. 

Such personal confidence comes by working hard, staying positive, and embracing HOPE. 

Everything will work out fine.

During the financial crisis of 2008, my job as a recruiter was going away. 

In order to stay with The Ritz-Carlton, I was going to be required to move my family to the West Coast. 

I distinctly remember touring homes to consider renting or buying and being very disappointed and upset by the exorbitant prices and small spaces. 

How could I create such a huge change for my family simply by a personal career decision? 

Feeling down & desperate, I decided to apply for a different role with the parent company, Marriott, which would enable us to remain stable in the DC area. 

I distinctly remember being incredibly anxious, waiting to learn if I got the position.

Allowing my feelings to be dictated by someone else's decision regarding whether or not I got the job was not healthy.

A better approach would have been to use Ray's approach and Hoda Kotb's advice, and realize that "I had nothing to lose" either way. 

I didn't have the job anyway.

As luck and good fortune would have it, I secured the new job and remained stable. 

But I didn't need to worry. 

When you live like you’ve got nothing to lose, you actually have everything to give.

“Nothing to Lose, Everything to Give” 

Shift Your Perspective on Loss

• You can’t lose what you never had. Whether it’s a sales lead, a job opportunity, or even a personal goal, don’t let the fear of “losing” something dictate your emotions. Reframe it: if it wasn’t yours yet, then it’s not a loss, it’s just a step in the journey.

Detach Fear to Unlock Confidence
Fear of losing creates hesitation and stress.

• Once you release fear, you act with more confidence, kindness, and generosity. Like Ray Snisky, lead without clinging to control,  and people will respond to your calm, assured energy.

Survival Proves Strength

• “But did you die?” may sound blunt, but it’s a reminder: you’ve survived worse. Every tough moment you’ve already endured proves your resilience. That perspective helps you face new challenges with courage and humor.

Don’t Let Others Dictate Your Worth

• Bart’s story from the 2008 financial crisis shows how easy it is to let outside decisions control our attitude.
• The healthier approach: ground yourself in what you can control (effort, positivity, hope) and trust that opportunities will align.

Lead With Abundance, Not Scarcity

• Success often tempts people to grip tighter. Instead, flip the script. Give credit. Give trust. Give space for others to shine. When you lead with generosity, you don’t diminish your success; you multiply it.

Choose Hope Over Fear

• Ray’s philosophy of never worrying about losing a job comes from discipline, optimism, and hope. By focusing on what can go right, you cultivate the resilience to handle whatever comes your way.

This week, practice saying to yourself:

“I have nothing to lose, but everything to give.”

• In sales, release the fear of rejection.
• In leadership, loosen your grip and give others more.
• In life, remind yourself you’ve survived tougher days, and you’re still standing.

For More Inspiration:

🎧 Listen to This Week’s Episode #198: Ray Snisky, President ALG Vacations and Amstar DMC. Be Better, Feel Better, Do Better, and Live with Greater Impact. Don’t miss your weekly dose of inspiration, tune in and take that next step!

Special thanks to our sponsor: Wishes, Inc.

Wishes, Inc. connects real people with real needs to brands, donors, and a community ready to do good. They help make dreams a reality, amplifying generosity, one wish at a time.

• Catch every episode on Apple, Spotify, or at mostpeopledont.com.

Each week, I sit down with leaders who share unfiltered wisdom and actionable insights, so you can too.